Fast

Gotta type fast, the baby's asleep. How can something so small kick your ass so hard? Really, my ass has been kicked up and down my street more times than I can count in the past few weeks. Poor kid's got gas. Enough gas to fuel the Space Shuttle. Gas that makes my poor baby a fuss pot. I've been using mylicon drops and then yesterday we bought something called Gripe Water that smells like licorice. It's supposed to be organic and holistic and stuff, made of fennel and ginger, so I'm less afraid of overdosing the poor kid.

The Prince has been adjusting quite well to his baby brother. I am very proud of him. I've found the pacifiers behind the couch a few times and I suspect that someone has been trying them out. I'm not making a big deal of it, just washing them with hot soapy water and putting them back where they belong. Better than him saying he hates the new baby, you know?

The King, well, the King has changed more diapers this time around. I am very proud of him. He's doing lots more hands on type of stuff. When the Prince was born he was very nervous and wouldn't hold him and wasn't very comfortable around him until he was much bigger and less breakable looking. Thanks King!

I just remembered I haven't eaten breakfast yet. I'm not really hungry, but I'd better go eat now while I can, before Screaming Mimi wakes up.

The Ad Execs Must Be So Proud

The Prince has only recently begun to draw pictures on his own. In the past few weeks I've gone through paper and scotch tape like you wouldn't believe. I'm relieved though, because I used to love to draw and color as a child and I was starting to think there was something wrong with him.

This is what he was inspired to draw yesterday morning:

Yes, that is the money you'd be saving if you switched to Geico.

Clarification

I think some readers misunderstood what I meant when I said I thought women who scheduled c-sections for convenience were crazy. I was talking about women who decide they'd like to have such and such a day as a birthday for their kid or a certain date/time works with their work schedules, etc. Not women who need one for medical reasons, like being overdue or something like that.

Sorry if I've offended anyone.

He's Out!

Well, the Little Prince decided to make his debut into the world the day before my due date. As I suspected, we had to go in and get him. I was in labor all day and actually dilated all the way to ten centimeters, but the little guy was so happy and cozy he just didn't want to come out. So I ended up having a c-section.

Having given birth both ways now I can honestly say that I think women who schedule c-sections for convenience are out of their minds. Here I am, one week later and I'm still having trouble getting around. Thank God my mother is here to help me because I honestly don't know what I'd do without her. Talk about pain! I admit, I'm a wimp. I get dizzy from paper cuts. But this is a new pain, one I'd rather not feel again.

I'm rambling. I haven't slept much. I don't know when I'll post again. In the meantime, here he is.

Out Of The Mouths Of Babes

We are a family of floppers. Our home, for the most part is designed for comfort. When you walk in you don't feel like you are in a museum. It's our home, we live here and we flop here. There are a few exceptions of course. The living room/dining room is for when we have guests (which is like never) and I try to keep the furniture in those rooms relatively presentable at all times. Translation: No one is allowed in those rooms without express permission of me, Mommy Queen Of Everything. The only one I let slide is William our cat because, really, have you ever tried to get a cat to listen to you?

But seriously, you can flop in any other room in our house. Put your feet on the furniture, I could care less. Make yourself at home. Mi casa es su casa, you know? I do, however, have a bedroom ensemble that I am quite fond of and am trying to keep presentable. It has a quilt/bedspread that I refuse to let the King use as a blanket. Call me crazy, but I take it off of the bed every night and fold it in the closet until I make the bed in the morning. The King and I each have a floppy blanket that we use to sleep with and if we drool all over those, who cares?

The King has been known on occasion (much to my chagrin) to ignore my request of not using that quilt and just go to sleep. I've let him slide for the most part because it's usually after a long day at work and I can tell he's dead tired. But last night, LAST NIGHT I was two steps behind him going to bed. Don't you know he crawled right under that quilt without a second thought? So what did I do? I tried to take it off the bed. The King held on for dear life. Thus began battle 6, 723 of Why We Don't Ever Use Said Quilt For Sleeping.

Him: "It's a BLANKET!"
Me: " No, it's not, it's a BEDSPREAD!"
Him: " I have rooms I'm not allowed in, I have couches I can't sit on and I have a BLANKET I can't use. It doesn't make sense!"

We are by now laughing our asses off because we always have this discussion about the BEDSPREAD. The Prince, hearing the brouhaha from his room decides to come in and give his opinion of the whole situation. Bless him, he came down hard on my side.

King: "It's a BLANKET!"
Prince: "It's a BEDSPREAD!"
Me: "Can't you just let me have a few nice things?"
Prince: "This BEDSPREAD, it BRIGHTENS UP THE ROOM!"

He's five and even he knows a good thing when he sees it. I love that little boy.

39 Weeks

Well, I'm still here. And still pregnant! My due date isn't until the 18th. I thought for sure I would have had this baby already since I'm freakin huge, but no, he's comfy in there and I'm going to be pregnant forever. Sigh.

My mother is coming to visit on Saturday. I haven't seen her since my dad's funeral back in January. Hopefully all will go well. She hasn't travelled alone in years and she is stressing majorly about it. I keep telling her she is making way too much out of a simple plane ride, but she is really worrying. I keep telling her to ask for help if she needs it and to make sure to tell people she can't hear and to speak up. I feel sorry for her. To be so nervous all the time must take it's toll on you.

We put up one of those 2 ft. kiddie ring pools for the Prince this weekend. I was looking forward to a little sun and fun today and wouldn't ya know it, it's cloudy. The Prince likes the skimmer. He was outside all day yesterday standing by the pool holding the skimmer. When the King asked him what he was doing he said he was on "bug duty." We'll see how long that lasts.

A Little Goes A Long Way

I'm not ashamed to admit I bribed my son to go to Wal-Mart with me this morning. I had some slippers I needed to return and a few other things to get and I felt pretty darn good this morning. My son on the other hand, thought it was the perfect morning for hanging on the couch in his pajamas watching Phineas and Ferb. We had a small disagreement. What I mean by small disagreement was me losing my temper and threatening to drag him to Wal-Mart by his hair if he didn't go get dressed. Ahem.

Finally I resorted to the kind of bribery my mother used to use on me when I didn't want to go grocery shopping with her. She would buy me a hot dog and a soda from the snack bar. Not the healthiest bribe in the world, but it worked every time. (You have to understand that even now, thirty years later, the thought of grocery shopping with my mother is the stuff of nightmares. Seriously, that woman is in the store for HOURS. It is torture. I'd rather be water-boarded.) So anyway, I told my son that if he quit whining and got dressed and acted like a human being in the store that I would buy him a red Icee and a pretzel. It worked. We zipped around that store and I got the things I needed. Sonny boy got his goodies and all was right with the world.

I did cut my finger on one of their shopping carts. I went into the bathroom and washed it off and wrapped a paper towel around it to stop the bleeding. It's really not bad, although I shudder to think of all the cooties that were probably living on that cart. Oh well, at least I'm up to date on all my shots! :)